The Grave Diggers.

As I dig up your grave with the same old face, breathing and frowning. The way you've always seen me. I'd never tell you what I was thinking when the soil of your grave seeped into my shoes, or when I couldn't stop digging until I saw you. The only thing you'd ever know, was when I saw the sun and your dead face at the same time. You'd always be real to me.

A quickie.

You're so funny
you make me money and
I'd like to think its okay
since its friday.
You're probably wonderin' why Im trying to rhyme,
since I suck and you'd probably die,
but my friends at school
try to be cool 
with their words and rhymes
during break time.

Its only in my head.

You know what's funny... in a scary way? Having a dream about your sister driving her birthday car while some scary dude crashes into her... while Im there.

Its final.

Yes. It's final. 'You' is my friend and thats all. I don't need anymore emotional baggage. I don't want to try.  


And even If it makes me feel like an idiot, going back and forward with 'You', at least I'll know that time can only heal the wounds I made myself. 

Suck Town right in my face.

Why does it feel like it's still holiday and that maybe tomorrow is just a mistake? I guess its probably because I haven't seen you in two weeks and a half. Oh yeah.


Wish me luck for school, known as 'Suck Town.'

Im such a gamer and you didn't know it.

All weekend I played Mortal Kombat vs DC Universe and Naruto: Ultimate Ninja Heroes.


This could be bad for my health if I do it on a daily basis. I'd feel guilty if I actually cared.

There and done.

I had a nice lunch with my family today and had fun.


Yes.


That is all. Hope everyone had a nice meal with their families because I think you're so cool.

Explosion in my brain.

I want to pee on your face and make you drink it like apple juice.

Destiny.

Some of us are meant to suffer, waking up day after day to a feeling that has no meaning while some have their whole life put out for them, but either way we have to stay alive because we have to see how the story ends.

Life can be innocent.

PIGLET: "How do you spell love?"

POOH: "You don't spell it. You feel it."

The gears shifting.

You know when people say, "You're just a child, you don't know anything about love or responsibility. We've got years of experience and you just have a few simple care-free years. Nothing drastic."

Sometimes I like to think you guys tell yourselves that so you don't need to get advice from people that actually care.

Talent Show.

I found these photos on my camera last night and thought I should put them up. I did.

Sorry for bad quality (my sisters boyf sucks man.)

Yeah, this is how we roll.

The grade 10s are super jas!

Thats what I thought.

Yeah. Its no surprise that you'd rather watch movies than talk to me.

Thanks for not telling me.

Shake it! Shake it! Shake it like you mean it!

YEAH! WOO HOO! GO BABY GO!

Tonight was our first night of Talent show! It was like a party on the stage.

Oh, Sweaty balls... you make it all better!

Fun and long day.

Tonight was fun.

Remember the post I posted about Talent Show (Instead of work. We do this), so anyway we have rehearsals from 6 pm till quarter to 9. And I had no lift to drop me there.

So I stayed at school. Who stays at school 12 freakin hours!

Fatima was with me and we bought McDs. Fun stuff. Oh.

And he was there.

:)

 

Instead of work, we do this.

Thursday and Friday is my school talent show. We have it every year and what we do is that each grade has to do something. Like an act or a dance. Its really weird.

And the weirdest part is that my group is dancing to the song Get Low by Lil' Jon & The Eastside Boyz. And Im gonna enjoy it.

Back to the surf walk.

On Friday I did something really bad.

When we got back from the surf walk I stepped on wet paint... And then we ran away.

Lol. Lets hope nobody finds out.

xoxo.

Walking the surf.

Tomorrows our school Surf Walk. We're walking from Muizenburg beach to Vishoek beach.

And I'll be walking with you. I really don't want to.

But at the same time I do.

Im the person behind the curtain.

I've let myself become friends with you because I know that if I can't accept the things you don't offer I wouldn't accept this reality.

And sometimes, when you write about things, I let myself become vulnerable and think "Maybe he was talking about me." But there's always that small little voice inside my head saying "You're invisible."

A day feeling like a beauty queen.

3 March 2010.

Happy Birthday Mama. Im glad that you didn't cry in front of me and that I remembered to put Fatima's name in the card.

--

4 March 2010

My sister needed my help today. I had to be her client. She had to put make-up on for me and red nail polish. 5 o clock in the morning.

It felt like a mask.

I was nervous for her because it would be my fault if she failed. I didn't want that to happen. I had to go to the bathroom 3 times.

I hope she passed.

xoxo.